We look at life as a journey many times. It has been compared to a road or a trail or just a long walk. When you have walked that road with someone for a long time and then they detour into eternity, leaving you here, that trail becomes lonely and not very inviting at all. As the song says, “you will never walk alone”, which is referring to having a relationship with Jesus. He will always walk with you, even into eternity.
The problem that we have with our walk through life is that our partner, spouse, friend, lover is here physically with us. We can touch them, talk to them, feel their embrace and just know that they are there. Walking with Jesus takes faith. Walking with Him daily takes more faith because you have to acknowledge Him for waking you today and giving you the ability to go on, even if your spouse or significant other isn’t there. This is something that He will do for you, but you have to depend on Him for it.
Don’t give up on life just because someone who you love isn’t there. Don’t quit because you feel as if your life is over, even if you feel like quitting. Those feelings are trying to make you give up and they come from Satan and his followers! Don’t let them tell you how to live or how to stop living! Your life is full, abundant and free in Jesus! Claim it, follow Him, read the Psalms which are mostly about Jesus anyway, His Word will give you the strength and the purpose to carry on when you don’t feel like it at all!
If your partner was a Christian, you will see them again. Eternity is a long, long time and when we enter into it we will find people that we never even knew in this life. But, they know us because they are part of our family even if we didn’t meet them. God loves us all, so the only thing that we should do is return that love by living our life for Him until we are called home.
We each know someone who was an inspiration to us while they lived and in the way they lived, yet somehow when they are gone there are times that we can’t remember. Some remember the good times, some remember the not-so-good times, some remember the smile or the laughter or the way they held their cigarette if they smoked. Many things about those who are important to us, while they still live, they don’t seem so important. But, when we can’t call them or go see them…each little bit is precious…at least to those who loved them. Who will remember how you lived or what you said? Think about your life now and the impact that it will have on those around you…while you live, because once you are gone the imprint and influence that you had in this life will live on.
It is important to remember and never forget the things that we loved about a person that we can’t see anymore, so make your memories good while you can.
Every day we all come into contact with the death of people, either in the news or a family member, sometimes even a friend. So how do you deal with the loss? How do you deal with the feelings of inadequate time to tell someone how you felt?
How can you handle the depression and loneliness that follows a loss like this? Many people can’t handle it. Handling it means that you can overcome it or even that you can get over it, but you can’t. Death, especially the death of a child or a close family member can almost paralyze you emotionally and physically. This can lead to more depression, and anger at yourself for not feeling what you want to feel or need to feel. The that anger turns on you and causes you pain because it adds to the depression and the circle begins again.
How can you handle these issues in life? Can you handle it alone? The answer is, no you can’t handle it, especially not alone!
So, what do I suggest that you do? First, seek out a partner, someone who you trust and that you can talk to. It doesn’t have to be a counsellor, but it can be a pastor or even just a good friend. The feelings that come to the surface at the time that you lose someone close to you are feelings that you may never have felt before. Pain, loss, fear, anger, and also numbness. You feel the numbness, the lack of feeling, the feeling that nothing matters and then comes the anger at being left to deal with this pain and loss. This is the time that you have to search out someone who can help you.
If you have spent much time in church during your life, then it is time to seek out God through a session with your pastor. You don’t have to tell him or her everything on the first visit, but seek them out and then seek out Jesus. If you already know Him as your Savior, great! He is there with you, comforting you through His Word. Read some of the Psalms, especially fifty-one and twenty-three. There is comfort in God’s Word, there is also healing. The Psalms got me through a time of depression, where I was considering suicide for no reason at all, that I could see or even feel. Yes, God can help, but only if you let Him and ask Him to.
Seek Him out, because He already knows where you are. 🙂